Snippets: Here and There
by DeviWan
Summary: Unrelated snippets centering Uchiha Itachi. There is yaoi, shounen ai, but not for all. It takes place after the original series, but before and during the Shippuden series. Enjoy and leave a review! Each update is not related to each other in any way!
1. Chapter 1

**Snippets: Here and There**

"_Moments; here and there, concerning Uchiha Itachi that I've obsessed over, thinking of the possibilities. Because I thought I'd share them with you and see if similar thoughts had gone through your head, I wrote these. They're Itachi-centered (because after all this time I'm still obsessed with this character.) They're also slashy… yaoi-y. In fact, I'm sure most the updates will be slash. And if you're reading this, then you must be an Uke-Itachi fan just like myself."_

Title: Criminals These Days… [Shippuden Season 1 Episode 14]  
>Pairing: none<br>**Warning**: Spoiler for Shippuden. It is not a slash snippet. None of these snippets are in chronological order; they're very random. Also **UN-BETA**ED

…***…**

The blond one was finally awake, out of that genjutsu he was in that had him gasping for breath. Chiyo wanted to blame the child on his recklessness… for even getting caught in a genjutsu, but with an opponent like Uchiha Itachi, she really couldn't. In any case, if he really wanted to, Uchiha could probably put her under just as easily. There was no doubt here that he was in control of the battle. If they won this and went on to rescue the Kazekage, Chiyo would most likely thank Lady-Luck, and not their skills. It has been a long time since she'd dealt with an Uchiha, but it seemed that this Itachi brought the powers of the clan to a godly level. She's missed out on much.

When she finally squashed a bit of her pride down, Chiyo could say that it was impressive, but until she could actually say it out loud, she'd just glare at the Uchiha and hope he tripped over his own feet.

Standing back with the talented pink-haired girl, whom she thought had a disturbing resemblance to Tsunade, she watched as the Jinchuuriki and the son of her sworn –dead- enemy fight.

The Uchiha fired small, fast fire balls at Kakashi, and Chiyo admired the agility with which he dodged the attacks. She could remember the days clearly when she could move like that, when the world seemed to give way to her body. Now, though, now she was heavier, stiffer. Of course, she could still kick ass… she was here after all. The Kazekage had better damn well be grateful if or when they get to him.

After the first attack, the Uchiha brought his hands up, put them together with flexible fingers and blew out a fire ball a size Chiyo never thought she'd see again. It was massive, and it moved fast and consuming. She and the two young ones next to her jumped out of the way, but the ball got bigger the more it travelled, and faster too. She felt the sleeves of her robe singe, and only the smell of burnt grass prevented her from smelling her burnt robe.

It pissed her off, because she only brought one robe –the one she was currently wearing- for this trip.

But more than that, it annoyed her that the Uchiha had purple, perfectly manicured nails. She was almost certain that criminals back when she was young didn't have nails quite well taken care of like this. From the protection of the forest, she watched Kakashi and Itachi face off. Kakashi was preparing a jutsu, one that cackled like a thousand birds and made everything around it a hue of blue. Even then, she paid a little of her attention on the Uchiha and his fashion.

Perhaps the Akatsuki thought that they'd appear more intimidating if they had purple nail. It didn't seem to be working; especially not on Uchiha, who didn't need any more help in appearing effeminate and frail. And there was the cloak!

She might actually like the cloak, because it was huge on the Uchiha and increased the probability that he could end up getting tangled in it and trip over. But she also wondered what they did in summer, because it's got to be hell for them. Maybe they had a summer version of the cloak… with short sleeves and the length being down to their knees instead of their shins.

She had many conflicting thoughts on the Akatsuki's sense of fashion, but in the end, she begrudgingly admitted that the cloak was good. Uchiha probably had enough weapons hidden under there for a whole army, but knowing is not enough. They knew it, knew he had something hidden under his sleeves, but it didn't make predicting his actions any easier. Like when Itachi brought his arm out from his cloak and Chiyo saw Sakura tense up next to her, no doubt preparing for a weapon, only for him to come out empty-handed.

It was only after Naruto's Rasengan hit a fake Itachi, and she saw the Uchiha briefly send her a knowing smirk, that she realised she herself had tensed up, preparing for an attack that would never come. The only attack that really hit her… was panic and in situations like these, it was just as lethal as any other weapon. And it was all because of those distracting purple nails and deceitful cloaks.

So, yeah, damn them and their ridiculous fashion code.

Because in the end, she still hadn't figured out what the purple nail polish was for.

…***…**

These snippets will have nothing to do with each other. They're not related in anyway.


	2. Chapter 2

**Snippets: Here and There**

"_Moments; here and there, concerning Uchiha Itachi that I've obsessed over, thinking of the possibilities. Because I thought I'd share them with you and see if similar thoughts had gone through your head, I wrote these. It is Itachi-centered (because after all this time I'm still obsessed with this character.) It is also slashy… yaoi-y. In fact, I'm sure most the updates will be slash. And if you're reading this, then you must be an Uke-Itachi fan just like myself."_

Title: When the Rasengan Missed… [Shippuden Season 1 Episode 15]  
>Pairing: NaruIta  
><strong>Warning<strong>: Spoiler for Shippuden. It is a Naru/Ita snippet. None of these snippets are in chronological order; they're very random.

**…*…**

Like most attacks, Naruto felt that everything had been leading up to this moment… this moment where he'd drive a god-damn Rasengan through the smug Uchiha's chest.

Kakashi had leaded him on with a Raikiri, and he'd followed with a Rasengan.

Beside him his clone popped out of existence, but that was okay… because there was a rapidly spinning Rasengan in his hand. He was in the air, and Naruto realised sooner or later he'd have to come back down to Earth, but before that happened he'd really like to put this Rasengan where it belonged. Below him Sasuke's older, and very evil, brother looked up, a look of surprise shying his face. The older man was also in the air, but lower than Naruto, from his jump to avoid Raikiri.

It was at that moment that Naruto thought, '_Bloody hell, but those Akatsuki cloaks are huge!_' Because the extra-large collar flapped about on Itachi's shoulders. It was really, very wide. The more it flapped, the more of Uchiha Itachi's creamy, smooth shoulder is revealed.

Many thoughts ran through Naruto's head, a lot of them random, but mostly inappropriate.

'_No scars,_' he silently observed. Of course not; there was no way Sasuke's sworn enemy would be reckless enough to get scars from anything.

The collar flapped again, as everything seemed to go in slow motion. '_Smooth_," he thought. What he could see of Itachi's shoulders wasn't just smooth because it had no scar; it was smooth in that it looked really soft. It almost made Naruto stop the Rasengan because it'd really be a shame to mar that perfection. It must be a family thing, he thought, because he remembered Sasuke had that smoothness too. Only, as they completed more missions as gennins, the smoothness on Sasuke went away and was replaced by a slight, healthy tan that only came from long days out training. Also, after that mission where Sasuke played a pin-cushion for Haku's senbons… well… things just weren't as smooth after all. But Itachi still had that smoothness, and Naruto was almost scared of what it indicated. There was probably nothing out there that could harm Itachi.

The wide collar flapped once more, but this time Naruto also noticed that Itachi's dark hair flapped too. When it flapped out, it revealed his entire face… and Naruto was left feeling guilty. Kakashi, Sakura and the old-lady Chiyo were depending on this attack to finish him off, so that they could finally get to Gaara… Oh! Gaara! Gaara was waiting for him, damn it! Yet here he was, in mid-air with a Rasengan ready to pummel, and he was feeling that pull of attraction that only occurred when he was in bed and dreamed of Sakura. Because Uchiha Itachi's got to be the prettiest man he's ever laid eyes on!

Itachi's face was still stoic, forever set in that Uchiha face: blank eyes, smug and still so damn attractive. And Itachi was just there, with his wide collar revealing a little too much skin for an S-ranked criminal, with his stupidly long lashes framing his girly eyes and his coral-coloured lips.

Naruto swallowed, and he was pretty sure Itachi heard that gulp. He was attracted to Uchiha Itachi: the man that started it all, the man who ruined Sasuke's life, who made Naruto lost his best friend, who's standing between him and Gaara.

'_Pretty_,' he thought, and was shocked that he was actually surprised by his own thought.

There was a halt, the Rasengan fluttered aggressively in his hand, and then slammed into Itachi's chest. The moment his feet touched solid ground again, Naruto was angry, because Itachi was still alive and it'd all been another trick.

He straight away ran from the crater his Rasengan created, breathless and sweating… and not just from the fight. He hid behind the nearest large tree he could find and silently watched the slim shadow of Uchiha Itachi materialise through the dust. Damn it, that pretty face didn't even have a scratch… and to make things worse, those wide Sharingan eyes were damn analysing him!

'_Damn_,' he thought, '_Should have known it wouldn't be that easy_.'

**…*…**

These snippets will have nothing to do with each other. They're not related in anyway.

Please Review!


	3. Chapter 3

**Snippets: Here and There**

"_Moments; here and there, concerning Uchiha Itachi that I've obsessed over, thinking of the possibilities. Because I thought I'd share them with you and see if similar thoughts had gone through your head, I wrote these. It is Itachi-centered (because after all this time I'm still obsessed with this character.) It is also slashy… yaoi-y. In fact, I'm sure most the updates will be slash. And if you're reading this, then you must be an Uke-Itachi fan just like myself."_

Title: Reasons for So Many Hits… [Shippuden Season 1 Episode 15]  
>Pairing: KisameItachi (you'd have to squint if you wanna see some slash.)  
><strong>Warning<strong>: Spoiler for Shippuden. It is a Kisa/Ita snippet. None of these snippets are in chronological order; they're very random.

**…*…**

So, sending the weird, prone-to-amnesia man with the thickest pair of eyebrows some giant, man-eating sharks didn't work, it didn't have to mean anything.

Afterwards, when said man with bushy eyebrows came back up to the surface with orange skin and popping veins, Kisame could have sworn things weren't supposed to head this way.

The man started pummelling him, with punches that felt like a mountain crushing him and kicks that knocked his lungs out and then back in again. He could actually take him, could actually defend himself against these attacks, but Kisame had other things on his mind. And when Hoshigaki Kisame had other things on his mind, well… things start aching. The Konoha jounin continued to beat him, and Kisame let him, and he could see that the other was starting to get confused. Kisame could tell that he wasn't used to beating opponents who didn't fight back. This, he thought, was at least admirable. The three brats behind him were lucky… had a good sensei.

Gai –Kisame was sure his name was Gai- kicked him in the jaw and he soared several meters high in the sky. His ascending gave him time to sort his thoughts. The first one was that Itachi wasn't here; he was somewhere else and therefore, not here. He would never admit it, but Itachi's health had gone downhill since he was sixteen. When they're not in front of people who want to kill them, Itachi let out coughs and shudders, and Kisame could only watch. Because Itachi wasn't the type to let anyone else take care of him. The kid knew he was going to die, was damn well planning on it and Kisame could only stand back and let it happen.

He'd thought about buying the kid medicine, but he didn't know shit about that, and might just end up killing the kid himself. He let the younger handle the medicine buying. So, Itachi wasn't helpless, could do things Kisame couldn't even begin to comprehend, but he was fragile in that the right punch, aimed to the right area in the chest, could end him. And right now, he was somewhere off fighting a team with a ninja known for having copied over a thousand jutsus, and Kisame was left with this pain-in-the-ass thing called '_worry_.'

The second thought in his head as his jaw ached and Gai followed him up in the air was '_Fuck, Itachi forgot his medicine this morning._' By that he meant, on the morning they left to start unsealing and re-sealing the Ichibi, Itachi had left his massive bag of medicine in their motel room. That was three days ago.

Gai pummelled him, right there, in the air. His punches were so power-packed and fast that Kisame's robe started ripping to bits. The final punch threw him back down below, in the water, into the rocks of the desert. The water around him evaporated, and Kisame felt himself dying.

He blinked, and he was back in his real body and Itachi was right next to him, still fighting his own battle through someone else's body. A grin started spreading across his face, and his chest felt a hell of a lot lighter, despite the chakra exertion he just went through. When the younger man opened his eyes and lowered his arms, Kisame was suddenly relief that they'd used the clones. They'd only give thirty percent of their chakras to those clones, and no wonder Gai had easily beat him. If he'd been there though, Kisame was sure there'd be nothing left of the man.

"Looks like you're done too, huh?" He growled to the kid. Really, he should stop calling him 'kid,' though it doesn't help that every time he imagined Itachi, he saw the kid he met years ago, in his way-too-big ANBU gears and drenched in his kin's blood.

"Yes, I was out of chakra," Uchiha stated, his voice still smooth and velvet despite the slight fatigue he must be feeling. Kisame wanted so badly to remind him that he'd forgotten his medicine, but held back, because he didn't want to be scolded by a kid ten years his junior for meddling. No matter, because when Itachi bent over and coughed up his lungs, and some blood, he'd remember, and they'd go back to the motel to get the medicines.

Still, when they finally got up and moved away, the heaviness returned to his chest. Worry was worry, and there was no changing that. Right now, and up til the moment Itachi's heart stopped beating, Kisame was going to worry. He'd long ago given up trying to deny that.

**…*…**

These snippets will have nothing to do with each other. They're not related in anyway. And please review!


	4. Chapter 4

**Snippets: Here and There**

"_Moments; here and there, concerning Uchiha Itachi that I've obsessed over, thinking of the possibilities. Because I thought I'd share them with you and see if similar thoughts had gone through your head, I wrote these. It is Itachi-centered (because after all this time I'm still obsessed with this character.) It is also slashy… yaoi-y. In fact, I'm sure most the updates will be slash. And if you're reading this, then you must be an Uke-Itachi fan just like myself."_

Title: What's in a Smile… [Sometime Between the Original and the Shippuden Series]  
>Pairing: KisameItachi  
><strong>Warning<strong>: Spoiler for Shippuden. It is a Kisa/Ita snippet. None of these snippets are in chronological order; they're very random.

**…*…**

Akiko didn't mind working in the sweets shop. If she had to be here for the rest of her life, she still wouldn't mind, because her grandparents worked hard to start this business, and every day she got to work with her loving grandmother. There were moments where she felt trapped and wished to see something else. In those moments all she wished for were short travels to other places, but in the end she would always end up here, in this little sweets shop.

In her early teenage years she got her wishes. She travelled with her uncle to surrounding villages and towns to buy ingredients and sell the sweets they made and just experience. Now though, now that she was in her twenties, she left the travelling to her uncle alone. Akiko's grandmother needed her here –because children these days have ridiculous sweet-tooth. Still, occasionally she yearned for new, different things.

She never travelled again though. Instead she let the new things come to her and her little shop. And most people would not believe the things that she saw…

Like this one time, nearly two months ago, a pair of men came in for tea and dango. The first was absolutely huge despite his age, with the brightest of silver hair –long and spikey- and could be spotted a mile away. He had red, thin streaks running down his cheeks, like tear trails, and it was obvious to Akiko right away that the pair were ninjas. The large man was all smiles, loud and boisterous… and the second, younger man seemed to be even louder, more boisterous. He was blond with a healthy tan and the bluest eyes. Her initial thought was '_Oh, if I was only a few years younger.._.' The pair ate and left, just as grand as their entrance.

It was experiences like that that told her she wasn't missing out on much by staying with her grandmother and their little shop. Of course, it could be that she only told herself that so that she wouldn't get depressed at night.

Today, another pair of ninjas walked into her shop.

The first one she noticed was also large –it seemed that she only noticed the larger one first. He was really, very large, bulky in places she could only imagine, with muscles that she privately drooled over. His skin was a greyish hue of blue, and Akiko hoped it was some kind of jutsu and not genetic. He was in a cloak; they both were, in fact. The cloak was completely black, and she could only pity them in the summer heat. The blue-man grinned and said something to his partner and that was when Akiko noticed the gills on his high cheekbones. She grimaced, and decided her attention was best on the other one.

And she almost missed him altogether because the second one, still in the same cloak with the red clouds, was almost covered up by the other's bulk. She didn't miss him, though, because it's hard to miss someone who's got a presence like royalty, like Akiko was even lucky to be breathing the same air. And he was modest too, because the young man with the long dark hair didn't have his chin tilted up like an arrogant pig. In fact, he didn't seem to take notice of any other customers. Akiko summed that the only way to get his attention was through an attack of some sort. '_Too bad_,' she thought, because this could have been the first time she'd ever go after a younger man.

"This way, Kisame," he muttered quietly before leading the bigger and older man to the table nearest to the back. Okay, so the big blue man was named Kisame. '_Fitting_,' she thought, because the man did resemble a shark… even though she hadn't seen a drawing of a shark in years.

The pair walked past the front counter, took two menus and walked on to the table. Disappointment bubbled in her chest, because the beautiful man didn't even spare her a glance. Well, it's not like she'd someday introduce him to her uncle, because she doubted he'd like his only niece dating a guy almost as pretty as her.

She got to serve them, though. She took their orders; three plates for Kisame and one for the other, much smaller one. And it was Kisame that told her the orders too, while the other one seemed lost in his own world. Up close, she took in the small, angular face. He was pretty, like she thought at first, and together the pair completed the 'beauty and the beast' saying. Personality wise, she thought that the pretty one might be the beast, because he was cold and silent and sad. And she could tell that Kisame knew this too.

It made her wonder, as she started making the dumplings, what the dark haired one would look like with a smile on his dainty face. It would no doubt be a sight to behold.

Nearly an hour later, and four more sets of three plates of sweets, she saw it.

Outside the shop, a cart selling watermelons rolled past, and Kisame went after it. The shop served water, but she didn't think water would fulfil someone as large as Kisame.

The giant of a man hurried in his thirst for something naturally sweet. The strap holding his gigantic sword had been loosened a long time ago, and now, as he hurried to go outside before the cart disappeared; it tangled up in his ridiculously long legs. The man didn't go down, but his giant sword swerved to the side, nearly hitting his partner in the shoulder, and dropped by near the next table. The couple there started in surprise, food halfway to their mouths.

"Shit," Kisame cursed. He held up his hand and waved them about. "I'm sorry, sorry!" He turned to them and backed away.

Akiko watched as he bumped into other tables and created havoc. Beside her, Akiko heard her grandmother sigh. It was okay, because every now and then some person would come in and eat their sweets and be mellowed to the point of being uncoordinated.

"Ah, shit! Sorry, sorry… wait! Watermelon! Come back!"

And the man was gone, running after the cart.

The shop settled into silence, as everybody stared at the door, anticipating whether he'd come back in just as he'd exited; wild and chaotic. A cough broke the silence, and things were back to what they were minutes before.

Akiko glanced back to the smaller of the two partners, curious to see if he was embarrassed or not. And he was not, because there was a smirk gracing his peachy lips, and as he took his cup of tea to his lips, the smirk turned into a smile. Akiko felt her chest warm, like it did when she saw something adorable and wished to sigh, "Aww." Because there was a fond smile on his lips, and his pale, stoic face lit up like the fireworks in spring. Beautiful was the word that came to mind, and Akiko was surprised to feel a bit of jealousy there. Because she had no doubt that this man lived an adventurous life, to be all the time with an interesting partner like Kisame. She could fall in love at that moment, if she really let herself, but in this world she knew better than to fall for a ninja. Still, it didn't make it any better. She still wished she could keep the beauty to herself.

Akiko watched as he bent down and pulled the strap of the big sword up, bringing with it the sword itself, and settled it against the table. '_It'd be so easy_,' she thought, '_to just love him_.' She thought back to the pair that came in two months ago, and remembered how she thought the same thing about the blond one.

The door banged open, and Kisame stood in it with two big watermelons tucked under each arm. But the clumsy fool loosened by sweets was gone, and in his place stood another Kisame; one that was scowling and cursing under his breath. "Fucking old man… these watermelons had better be worth it, or I'll hunt him down and chop…" The rest of the rant was cut off as he sat back in his seat.

From her place behind the counter, Akiko saw Kisame's partner close his eyes, as if this was something that happened every day. He muttered something, too quiet for Akiko to hear, and Kisame broke into an ear-splitting grin, like a kid who was told that apparently his birthday was every day. And as Kisame brought out a kunai and proceeded to eat the watermelons, Akiko watched, with a dawning blush on her cheeks, as their feet moved back and forth against each other's under the table, like a caress between lovers. It was intimate and private and she felt like she was intruding. Obviously these two were no used to sharing their intimacy, and every second of it counted. Now she had no doubt she didn't stand a chance with the pretty one.

"Oh," she breathed out loud, the blush worsening.

Because, damn it, she was a woman. She was supposed to notice these things right away, where was her trusted intuition when she needed it most? Glancing sideways, she wondered if her grandmother knew…

**…*…**

These snippets will have nothing to do with each other. They're not related in anyway.


	5. Chapter 5

**Snippets: Here and There**

"_Moments; here and there, concerning Uchiha Itachi that I've obsessed over, thinking of the possibilities. Because I thought I'd share them with you and see if similar thoughts had gone through your head, I wrote these. It is Itachi-centered (because after all this time I'm still obsessed with this character.) It is also slashy… yaoi-y. In fact, I'm sure most the updates will be slash. And if you're reading this, then you must be an Uke-Itachi fan just like myself."_

Title: His own Pain… [When Itachi first joined Akatsuki.]  
>Pairing: SasoriItachi  
><strong>Warning<strong>: It is Sasori/Itachi snippet. None of these snippets are in chronological order; they're very random.

**…*…**

There was a boy walking in the halls of Akatsuki.

He was young, and he was too attractive for a boy his age. At any first glance, Sasori thought him too petite, everything about him made to be too perfect. The raise of his fine eyebrows were perfectly carved out, and Sasori scoffed at him for it. What kind of ninja could the boy be, if he was that pretty? His face was still rounded, like any child that age should have been, and his face, and any place else, was still cleared of any scar. He was small, made even smaller when he was assigned to his partner. Kisame was a large man, and the boy, Uchiha, seemed to shrink in comparison.

His cloaks hung off him, and it didn't do anything to improve his looks. People would still underestimate him, and then they'd pay for it.

As he grew older, he still got prettier. He was powerful too, and handled that power well. If the boy wasn't so darn clever, he'd make a perfect weapon.

It was not surprising that Orochimaru, Sasori's old partner in crime, had lost control and gone after the boy. It wasn't surprising at all, not when Sasori had been days away from making the same move. Uchiha Itachi would have made for a fine puppet, though preserving his eyes would have proved challenging. Still, it was good that Orochimaru moved first, because he was the one to be banished from Akatsuki with a severed hand and a wounded ego.

Sasori stayed away after that, even when he was tempted to just kill the Uchiha when he was the one who got him that blond for a partner. Brats; all of them.

The most prominent thing he noticed about Akatsuki's prettiest member was the pain he carried around with him. It was so heavy, so crushing that Sasori thought, '_Let him suffer, I don't need to do anything_.' That was when he decided that he didn't really want Itachi as a puppet, not when he was going to carry his burden with him, even in death. It seemed likely too, that he would carry his pain to death. Sasori didn't want that around him.

When he killed his victims and made them puppets, he killed their pain, ended them completely. With Itachi, he didn't think there was anything to stop his pain. He wondered, was it the guilt of killing his own family? Or was it the guilt of letting his little brother live and suffer? Maybe it wasn't any form of guilt at all, maybe it was just him. Sasori didn't care. Whatever the reason, he surely didn't want that pain around him. Let the boy suffer and die by someone else's hands. Sasori didn't want anything to do with pain like that.

**…*…**

These snippets will have nothing to do with each other. They're not related in anyway.

REVIEW!


	6. Chapter 6

**Snippets: Here and There**

"_Moments; here and there, concerning Uchiha Itachi that I've obsessed over, thinking of the possibilities. Because I thought I'd share them with you and see if similar thoughts had gone through your head, I wrote these. It is Itachi-centered (because after all this time I'm still obsessed with this character.) It is also slashy… yaoi-y. In fact, I'm sure most the updates will be slash. And if you're reading this, then you must be an Uke-Itachi fan just like myself."_

Title: Day and Night… [Any time before Orochimaru died.]  
>Pairing: SasuIta!<br>**Warning**: SLASH and YAOI and **UCHIHACEST**! Snippet. None of these snippets are in chronological order; they're very random.

**…*…**

"Day and night," Orochimaru hissed to Kabuto. "That boy, his thoughts are surprisingly one tracked for someone called a genius."

Amused, Kabuto put down the cup he was pouring tea into and glanced at his master over his shoulder. "Hmm? What are you complaining about now, my lord? I thought you were happy with the way things are progressing."

With his back to Kabuto, Orochimaru remained seated, his eyes locked on the seal on the opposite wall. His lips pulled down in distain; his apprentice –Kabuto, not Sasuke- was getting too used to using his sarcasms. "I am," he said. "But sometimes, it makes me wonder how Sasuke can function. Every minute of the day, it's Itachi this, and Itachi that. Mind you, it serves to drive him further up the wall." He gripped the arms of the seat. "Itachi," he hissed. "If I hadn't underestimated him, his body would be mine."

Kabuto smirked. "Well, you do prefer the pretty ones. I'm guessing Sasuke's not as pretty as his brother?" He'd only seen blurred pictures of Uchiha Itachi, he couldn't be too sure. Orochimaru preferred his hosts to be powerful, but if it could be helped, he preferred them pretty as well. Sasuke? Sasuke was not pretty, handsome, yes. His looks didn't have people thinking him delicate, pretty like his brother. People wouldn't underestimate him at first glance.

"Hmm." There was a pause, and that Orochimaru's lips tilted up. The smirk that now marred his pale face was more snake-like than ever. "I walked past his room the other night, and I heard something interesting. It made me realise that Sasuke's obsession is more than just _revenge_." He chuckled. "People say he's obsessed with revenge, but they're wrong. He's obsessed with his brother."

Kabuto put the cup of steaming tea on a tray and brought it over to his master. He hung onto every word his master said, usually, but when it came to Sasuke, occasionally he had to tune out. Sasuke could only be interesting for so long. "What did you hear my lord?"

Orochimaru laughed, his head thrown back as he remembered…

Simply put, he walked past the Uchiha boy's room when said boy was indulging one of the traits that came with being a teenager. "Let's say," he hissed humorously, "that in the wake of climaxing passion, it wasn't the name of any girl Sasuke knows that slipped from his mouth."

Despite his experiences with strangeness, Kabuto's eyebrows shot up into his hairline. A chuckle escaped his lips. He took the empty tea cup from his master's hand and set it aside. "Interesting. What are you going to do?"

Orochimaru's finger twitched irritatingly. What kind of a question was that? "I'm not going to do anything, fool!" His chakra spiked, sharp and stale and Kabuto stepped back, eyes on the floor. "Sasuke doesn't even realise this yet. Let's hope it continues to be so. I want him to expect to be charging at Itachi to end him, not… sexually assault him." Orochimaru saw Kabuto flinch, and he couldn't blame him. There really wasn't an easy way to say that Sasuke wanted to do things to his brother that should probably be illegal… like beat him half to death and then tear off his clothes and …ok.

"Perhaps," Kabuto started. "Next time you send Sasuke on a mission you should tell him that he's allowed to… take some time off and… find some girls…"

Snake-like eyes narrowed. "What do you think I've been doing for the last year, Kabuto? I've done everything short of stripping a girl and throwing her on top of that boy." His hand clenched. He really, really regretted underestimating Uchiha Itachi once upon a time. Oh, how easier things would be if that body was his, then he wouldn't have to put up with this guy who didn't even realise he was masturbating to his brother's name.

They were silent for the rest of the night, until Kabuto spoke before he went his own way.

"Maybe it's just a phase?"

Orochimaru remained silent. The thing that annoyed him the most was that, at times like this, he felt like the father of his teenage boy that he never wanted to have!

The next morning he assigned Sasuke a mission that took him to a red light district of a sort, one where there were beautiful men and women at every turn. He was positive that Sasuke would spend the night, if not the week, there. Only, the boy proved him wrong by being in bed at his usual time.

He finally gave up with a grunt. "Fine, have your balls turn blue and let them fall off, because there's no way you're going to get your hands on that brother of yours."

**…*…**

These snippets will have nothing to do with each other. They're not related in anyway. Review!


	7. Chapter 7

**Snippets: Here and There**

"_Moments; here and there, concerning Uchiha Itachi that I've obsessed over, thinking of the possibilities. Because I thought I'd share them with you and see if similar thoughts had gone through your head, I wrote these. It is Itachi-centered (because after all this time I'm still obsessed with this character.) It is also slashy… yaoi-y. In fact, I'm sure most the updates will be slash. And if you're reading this, then you must be an Uke-Itachi fan just like myself."_

Title: Things People Do for Money… [Any time Before Itachi's Death.]  
>Pairing: None… really… I'm serious…<br>**Warning**: None of these snippets are in chronological order; they're very random.

**…*…**

Kakuzu liked money. He probably liked it a little too much. It was border lining 'unhealthy obsession,' but who was going to say anything about it? It was even dangerous to walk around the man with money in your pocket. He might just eat you up.

Hidan knew this, and that was why he preferred to be penniless rather than be in the constant threat of being jumped by his partner. It was not a fear to live with, not at all. Hidan could handle lots of things; could even cut off his own head, no problem, but there was something disturbing about that glint in Kakuzu's eyes whenever money was involved. The Jashinist was right when he first called Kakuzu, 'maniacal bastard.'

The longer they were partners, the more Hidan came to realise that Kakuzu would be willing to do quite a lot for money.

Like… that one time he cut off Hidan's feet while he was asleep and sold it to the highest bidder. Yeah, not fun. It took a whole month of tracking and torturing to get that back. Never mind that Kakuzu said, "sorry about that.' It was the principle of the thing! Cutting off people's feet and selling them without their permission was just plain rude. Granted, if Kakuzu had asked, Hidan would have said yes, because… duh, two cases of gold. That's a lot for some feet.

The point is, Kakuzu was relentless. It's impossible to stand between his and money's way.

Everything he did, he channelled towards getting richer. If somebody walked past him, he picked their pockets. If somebody was mean to another person, he stole whatever they had on them. If somebody got on his nerves, he used them.

Uchiha Itachi got on Kakuzu' nerves last week.

Hidan wasn't even sure how that was possible, considering that the Uchiha barely spoke at all. But it had to be something expensive, for Kakuzu to get grindy and mutter. It had to be, because now, now Kakuzu was holding a pencil in a tight fist and drawing an epic-sized blueprint. It had to have been something expensive for sure.

"What the fuck did he do, exactly? You can't just plan people's death without a good reason, you freak. That's my thing." Hidan said.

"Twelve," Kakuzu muttered.

"Huh?"

"Twelve, Hidan! Fucking twelve bottles of hair and skin product that I found in Itachi's bathroom!"

Hidan jumped back, away from the obviously crazed ninja. The jump made him scratch his hand along his massive scythe. "Damn it! Look what you made me do! Now I'll have to sacrifice myself, you douche." The white headed man did not notice his partner's narrowing eyes. "So? What's wrong with that? Konan has even more."

"Yes, but Konan doesn't have the best of the best products. She likes quantity, not quality! The amount of money that Itachi uses is enough to buy the whole freaking Grain village!" Grain village was tiny, but it was a village nonetheless, and for Kakuzu to be using that comparison must mean something.

"Right, whatcha gonna do now, stitcho?" Hidan asked as he took off his cloak. Sacrifices were so messy, but he wouldn't change it. Jashin must be satisfied to be getting so many sacrifices a week.

"I'm going to sell Uchiha."

This made the Jashinist stop.

"How?"

"I'm getting there! Damn it, stop bugging me! Go kill yourself or something!"

"Well, aren't you just fucking dandy today?"

**.^.**

"So, did you sell him?"

"I did not."

"Why not?"

"He had leverage over me."

"Oh… the Sharingan?"

"No, that would have been much better."

Hidan thought. "He… threatened to crush your hearts?"

"No."

"What, man, what?"

"He was going to burn money! That boy is too… he was going to burn money! What the hell?"

It wasn't that Hidan hadn't seen it coming, not really. The Uchiha wiped his clan off the face of the planet; he didn't think that burning a few notes would be too difficult for the man.

"So what happened?" Hidan asked.

"Nothing. I gave him his clothes back and cut him down from the ceiling. The end."

It took a while, like, ten minutes a while, before Hidan could get the picture in his head to make sense.

**…*…**

These snippets will have nothing to do with each other. They're not related in anyway.

Please review.


	8. Chapter 8

**Snippets: Here and There**

"_Moments; here and there, concerning Uchiha Itachi that I've obsessed over, thinking of the possibilities. Because I thought I'd share them with you and see if similar thoughts had gone through your head, I wrote these. It is Itachi-centered (because after all this time I'm still obsessed with this character.) It is also slashy… yaoi-y. In fact, I'm sure most the updates will be slash. And if you're reading this, then you must be an Uke-Itachi fan just like myself."_

Title: Beard and All… [Before the Shippuden Series]  
>Pairing: KisameItachi  
><strong>Warning<strong>: _**YAOI!**_ None of these snippets are in chronological order; they're very random.

**…*…**

When Kisame woke up and had breakfast – a normal routine- he could honestly say that he did not have a feeling that the world wasn't right. In fact, everything was as it should be. His room was empty, with the exception of himself of course, and he can sense his partner's chakra signature in the other room. They just completed a high-pay mission and finally had enough money to stay at a hotel with hot springs. Heck, they could even rent a room for themselves, and not have to share as per usual. So, no, Kisame had no idea that the world was ending.

The possibility that the world could be ending, though, did slam him in the face when he opened his door and made his way down to the hot spring. He had to walk past Itachi's door to get there. He was not surprised when his partner walked out of his own room in a bathing robe. Kisame had one on as well. What did surprise him was Itachi's absolute expression of fury. Well, there actually wasn't any expression on his pretty little face… but Kisame knew him a long time, and could tell.

"Err," he muttered, his large hand fisting the edge of his robe. He left his sword in his room, and now he felt naked. "What's up?"

Itachi's icy black eyes glared at him, not in their usual shade of red, and turned down the hall. He stormed off. Kisame sighed in relief. A few minutes later he followed.

There were already other guests in the large hot spring, and upon Kisame's arrival, all conversations ceased. The staring started. Yes, for the love of God, he was blue, he had little gills and he was over 6'4. Yes, he did have massive arms and long muscular legs, and yes, it might be possible to do the washing on his six packs. Also yeah, he had a big dick. But the staring was just rude… and uncomfortable. Here he could never tell which ones were gay for him or not gay at all.

Straight away he made his way to Itachi.

In the end he would never know for sure what prompted the hassles. Three of the guys sitting closest to Itachi rose up, defensive, as if to protect The Uchiha Itachi. "Hey, hey, hey!" One of them barked, his hand outstretched near Kisame's wide chest. "Listen buddy, he wants to be left alone."

Sneering, Kisame asked, "Then what the hell are you people doing near him?"

All three stuttered.

Then Itachi reached out and pulled Kisame down with him. Before anything else could happen, the brunette straddled his bigger partner's lap. Now it was Kisame's turn to stutter. The three idiots blushed, and backed away. It was obvious now who was wanted and who wasn't. "Ita…" Petal-soft lips crashed onto his.

The heat that sprung through Kisame's being had nothing to do with the hot spring, not at all. He was very aware that they were both naked… okay, so everyone in that hot spring was naked, but Itachi was naked and _sitting_ _on_ him! And wow… he was writhing so beautifully. Their lips were attacked and wet, curious and slippery, but Itachi's hips were gyrating onto Kisame's manhood. It was hot.

He wanted to continue on, so bad, but damn it those perverts were staring at Itachi's naked back. He seeped his large hand through Itachi's thick, wet hair and pulled the smaller man back. They panted wetly against each other's lips. The kissing had stopped, but Itachi's hips were still moving. "Hey now," Kisame panted. "Not that I don't want this, but maybe we should do it somewhere else." Kisame was fine with anywhere else: in their room, on the bed, the table, the floor, against a tree… on a tree, anywhere… but not here.

"Move," Itachi grunted, his head ducked down against his partner's large, blue shoulder.

Forget about moving. There's a reason why a teleportation jutsu was invented.

Within milliseconds the two missing ninjas were tumbling onto Kisame's massive bed.

Itachi landed first, on his back, and Kisame landed on him. The black-headed beauty groaned, and Kisame knew he'd landed a little too hard. "Sorry, sorry," he whispered. He pulled up and off his partner, and soothed Itachi's pale hips with large hands. They'd definitely be bruised tomorrow. Kisame knew he wasn't the lightest person on Earth.

Ignoring his words, Itachi reached up and pulled Kisame's face down for a kiss. Itachi was great at everything he did, and it was no surprise that he was a great kisser. Soon they were gyrating against each other, sweat-slicked skin making sweet friction and wet noises. Then Itachi flipped them over.

Kisame would love nothing more than to continue this mindless act, but damn it! This was not Itachi-like. Was he under a Genjutsu? Has he been brainwashed, his personality erased?

Kisame sat up, Itachi still in his lap. "Hey, Hey, wait a second. I don't mind this, really, but… what the hell? What brought this on, huh?"

Itachi shrugged.

"Tell me… or I'm not fucking you."

"Fine," Itachi hissed, standing up.

Kisame panicked. "Na! I'm just kidding!" Then he pulled Itachi back down onto his lap. He took the back of Itachi's head in his large hand, which always seemed to tangle itself in his partner's long hair. He whispered wetly against Itachi's lips, "Just tell me."

"I'm not a threat," Itachi replied at last, his head turned a tiny bit to the side. To Kisame, it was Itachi's own way of pouting.

"Well, considering we're about to have sex, I'd like to think so."

"No, Kisame. I'm not a threat. Didn't you see today? The enemy outnumbered us eight to two, and they all went after you."

"Wasn't that a good thing? You hate fighting… and more fun for me!"

It was obviously something deeper than that, because Itachi stared at him. He _stared_. "They thought I was a captive. They thought you kidnapped me." He leaned in closer to Kisame. The moment caused their still-hard members to rub, and oh, but it was such sweet friction. "They were going to _rescue_ me, from _you_." The word 'rescue' had never sounded so dirty.

Kisame was so aroused he didn't even know what they were talking about anymore. "And?"

"Oh, shut up. I knew this was beyond your comprehension."

And they were having hot, kinky sex.

Kisame always knew that Itachi had a temper. He just never knew what it looked like… felt like. Why was he so offended? Itachi's made it clear, in a subtle, persuasive way that he would rather not fight if he could help it.

Any other thought he was going to have disintegrated when lust overcame him.

It certainly wasn't the first time he's had sex, but it was the only time that he wished could go on and on and on. Itachi was a mess, in a good… great way. The Uchiha would not stay still, and Kisame was only able to hold onto his long hair. It was obvious who was in charge this time, and Kisame didn't mind laying back, not when Itachi was so hot and tight and everything right. Kisame was a man as well, though, and after two rounds he switched their positing and loomed over Itachi.

Later, much later, when they both lay panting and sweaty, legs tangled with each other's and the sheets, Kisame asked.

"Again… what brought this on?"

Itachi turned. "Nothing. Let it go, Kisame."

Kisame did just that. If Itachi didn't want to tell, Itachi won't tell.

Kisame shifted closer. Technically they were sharing body heat, but if people wanted to call it spooning, then so be it.

**…*…**

These snippets will have nothing to do with each other. They're not related in anyway.

Please review.

I admit, this snippet started out with a real -sort of- plot, but halfway through it evaporated. I'd understand if it's not as enjoyable as the previous ones.

Review anyway, though. =D


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